Bill & Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure (Hollywood 2007)

Halloween Horror Nights Hollywood attraction
Bill & Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure
Attraction type	Show
Event	Halloween Horror Nights 2007 (Hollywood)
Park	Universal Studios Hollywood
Area	Upper Lot
Year	2007
Housed in	Fear Factor Stage
Based on	Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (1989) Various pop culture from 2007
Preceded By	Bill & Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure III (1999)
Followed By	Bill & Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure (2008)

Bill & Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure was one of the four shows that were featured during Halloween Horror Nights 2007 (Hollywood). It was located on the Fear Factor Stage.

Description

The boys from San Dimas return to the entertainment capital of LA with their most excellent time-traveling phone booth for a comedy satire of this year's pop culture and celebrity screw ups.

Experience

According to: http://www.billandted.org/halloween2007.htm

The Hollywood Bill & Ted began the same way that the 2006 show in Orlando started, with Jack Bauer from 24 coming out and assessing the situation then harassing a fan from the audience for information about the show (a clever way to work in the warnings and parental advisories.)

The opening musical number features female and male dancers and singers dressed in Naval uniforms a la the 40's and singing Christina Aguilera's song Candyman. The three female vocalists perform the song a la the Andrew Sisters.  Of course they eventually lose the jackets and reveal skimpier outfits beneath.  The We Will Rock You theme starts in a kind of hip hop variation.  Clips from Excellent Adventure come on the screen and talk about the mysterious phone booth.  Footage shows the booth taking off and onstage it descends and lands with the music Two Heads Are Better Than One in the background.  Bill & Ted exit the booth and introduce themselves.  They say they're happy to be back in "Smell A" on the Fear Factor stage, although Ted notes how everyone must suspend their disbelief for the show.  Bill asks Ted what they do now, and Ted says they totally wait for a villain to show up and try to take over the world, "Which should happen in three . . . two . . . one . . . "

The lights go out and lightning appears above them.  A female voice asks, "Did somebody say evil?"  Doors open and a bald figure stands backlit in the doorway.  "Dr. Evil!" Bill and Ted cry.  The person steps forward.  It's Britney Spears with her head shaved!  Bill & Ted are afraid she's shaved their heads as well, but she assures them that she didn't shave *that* part of their bodies.  Bill & Ted accuse Britney of going crazy and she says to blame the media.  Britney then introduces her celebrity princess drag team, Paris Hilton and Lindsey Lohan. Britney asks if they found the bar and they explain they got lost in the Valley and were almost arrested . . . again.  Lindsey wants to know where the "blow" is.  When Britney tells her it's on the table, Lindsey barrels through Bill & Ted to get to it.  Lindsey snorts and says she likes it, then falls down dead on the stage.  Paris pulls a pink defibrillator from her purse and brings Lindsey around.

Paris admits that they've made some mistakes in their careers but with Bill & Ted's time traveling phone booth they can go back in time and fix everything.  Bill says he will stop them and Paris threatens to stick him with a shiv. Britney explains Paris has picked up some bad habits in jail.  Lindsey gets into the booth and takes off without the others.  Dr. Doom arrives and tries to speak to Bill & Ted, but they can't understand what he's saying.  Finally he removes his mask and says in a high-squeaky voice, "I said 'Bill & Ted, you are gonna die!'  Gawd, how hard was that?"  Bill & Ted spot someone else with bushy eyebrows coming out of the audience and comment that he's not really that scary.  The guy introduces himself as Simon from Heroes, who says he steals superpowers from others while eating their brains.  Bill & Ted note that he can't seem to pick up a pair of tweezers.  Simon tells them to "Tweeze this!" and slams his hands together, which knocks Bill & Ted's heads together.  Britney laughs that Bill & Ted are totally screwed.

Ted exclaims that they totally need a most excellent hero to help them.  "Did somebody say hero?" a woman's voice calls from above.  She then screams and her body falls from above and onto the stage.  It turns out to be the Cheerleader from Heroes.  She calls in to report she's fallen from 500 stories and still has spirit.  Rocky Balboa appears in the audience and tells her that he has spirit as well, then approaches the stage using a walker.  Rocky declares "Shave the cheerleader!  Shave the world!"  The Cheerleader asks if he'd just said "Shave the Cheerleader."  Bill & Ted motion to their shaved parts and Britney says she highly recommends it.  Rocky takes a seat just in front of the audience.  The phone booth reappears and drops toward the stage as Ted points out to Britney that they have backup.  The door of the booth opens and Leonidas from 300 exits.  He announces he has brought an army of 299 Spartan warriors with him.  When nothing happens, he looks into the booth for his missing warriors.  Ted suggests that they're probably in line at a haunted house.  The video screen shows a line of Spartans waiting at a haunted house, wishing they had bought a "front of line" pass. Leonidas is angry that they went ahead without him.

Lindsey suddenly appears between Leonidas legs, crawling out of the phone booth in a drunken stupor.  Paris asks where the pirates are from Pirates 3 and Bill says they can't parody the show due to legal reasons.  Ted says that doesn't mean they can't find a way around it.  Jack Sparrow and Will Turner roller skate out and start swordfighting, then Wham!'s Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go starts playing and the two dance and skate around the arena in a kind of Blades of Glory way.  Britney says the song is gay and Jack comments that her head looks like the backside of a baboon.  Will Turner starts screaming for Jack to "Leave Britney alone!!!"  Britney announces it's time to kick some ass.  Ted asks if this is where they're all supposed to run for their lives and Britney says yes.  Paris is standing by a large switch that has a sign next to it reading "Danger - Do Not Touch - Power Voltage."  She asks what it does and pulls the switch.  All the lights go out and Paris says, "Hot!"

When the lights come back on the James Bond theme starts playing and Dr. Doom is seen lying in the middle of the stage with a knife sticking out of his chest.  Britney gives the order for her minions to kill the good guys and the chase around the stage is on.  Paris defibrillates Dr. Doom and revives him.  After the chase, Cheerleader is left alone on stage.  Mike Meyers from Halloween comes out and starts stalking her and she wonders "Whatever shall I do?"  She starts doing U.G.L.Y, you ain't got no alibi, You Ugly!  Mike Meyers stabs her in the shoulder and she screams, then rejuvinates so she wants to record it on her cel phone.  She explains that she just got stabbed by some dick wearing a William Shatner mask.  Mike Meyers keeps stabbing her with no effect, so finally he twists her neck and she falls to the stage.  She gets up again and is upset until she feels his biceps.  She realizes he's kind of cute and tells him to fix himself a drink while she slips into something more comfortable.  After she exits, he pulls off his overalls, revealing a t-shirt and boxer shorts and slicks his hair back.

A news team suddenly comes out in a Dateline-style version of catching sexual predators in the act.  The reporter asks if Mike Meyers know the girl is underage and he shakes his head no.  "Well, these chat blogs tell another story," the reporter points out.  Mike Meyers stabs the reporter and chases the news team off the stage with Cheerleader chasing after them yelling, "Do me again!"  Once they're gone, Ted says, "Well, at least the coast's clear!"  Bill says it sucks because they still don't have their booth.  They call to Rocky and hurry down to him, where they find him asleep.  "He's totally sleeping!" Ted realizes.  "Well, it's two o'clock in the morning, dude, we should be sleeping, too," Bill points out.  As they walk away, Bill suddenly grabs his head in pain. "What is it, dude?" Ted asks.  Bill explains his spider senses are tingling.  The black Spiderman comes down from above and Bill & Ted exclaim, "Spiderdude!"  Spiderman removes his mask and explains that he captures the man who killed Uncle Ben.  "Whoa, the rice guy's dead?" Ted asks.  They try to help him but he yells for them to get away from them, that the black suit makes him extra emotional.  He starts to cry.

"Why am I so angry?" Spiderman yells.  "Well, it's probably because Spiderman 3 totally blew," Bill explains.  "Shut up!" Spiderman, "I must express my anguish!  Dance!"  He starts doing a dance routine to a jazzy version of the old Spiderman theme.  Everyone comes out and joins him for a big production number.  Near the end of the number,  poof of webbing comes out of Spiderman's butt.  "Dude, what just came out of his ass?" Ted asks.  "The plot for Spiderman 3," Bill answers.  "Shut up!" Spiderman yells.  They end the musical number with a big finish.  The booth starts to smoke and a man steps out wearing dark glasses, a leather jacket and a hard hat.  Bill & Ted ask who he is and he explains in an Arnold Schwarzenegger style voice that he's the "Exterminator" and he's there to take care of their pest problem.  They both point to Spiderman. The man walks up to Spiderman and says he's seen this kind of pest before, then squirts him in the eyes, making Spiderman writhe on the floor.  "You see, this particular species lures you in with an exciting movie trailer and then attacks you with endless scenes of bull****."  He continues to squirt Spiderman with insecticide.  Spiderman cries, "I hate you!" and runs off the stage.  "Dude, will be be back?" Bill asks, mimicking Schwarzenegger again.  "Definitely," the Exterminator says seriously and explains that while the movies are making an obscene amount of money he'll never go away.  Ted gives the man Spiderman's mask as a souvenir.

The Exterminator starts to give Bill & Ted a coupon when Simon comes out and uses his powers to steal the coupon book away.  The Exterminator points out he has a whole book of them and Simon doesn't have to be a dick.  Simon is excited about having twenty percent off.  Bill & Ted ask what Simon wants and Simon says he wants to eat their brains, invoking the audience's help in answering their question.  Bill points out that only zombies eat brains and then their heads start to hurt.  They wonder who can save them.  Cherry Darling from Grindhouse comes out with her metal leg.  They ask what happened to her leg and she says it was eaten by zombies.  She's about to use her leg like a cannon to blow up Simon, but he gets into the booth and takes off.  Bill and Ted try to stop Cherry from blowing up the booth, but fortunately her aim is off and she misses.  Bill asks Cherry to help them get her booth back, but she says she has to refuel and walks off.  Ted comments that she's hotter than Bill's mom.  Bill says, "Shut up, Ted!"  Ted comments that at least it's not the end of the world. There is a loud growling sound and the arena shakes.  A huge, lumbering behemoth comes out of the audience.  "Rosie O'Donnell!" Bill exclaims.  Rosie threatens to eat everything, roaring like a monster.

Bill and Ted realize Rosie must be stopped.  The Apprentice music starts to play and Donald Trump rolls out on a Segway.  Donald explains that he's come out to kick Rosie's ass.  They get into a wrestling bout.  Rosie beats the crap out of Trump and then rolls over him.  They roll around on the stage and continue fighting before I'm All Out of Love starts playing and the two walk off, hand in hand, together in love.  Bill and Ted wonder how they're going to get their booth back and Bill suggests they ask some tech dudes.  They call to the back of the stage and ask the tech dudes if they can get their booth back.  "Okay!" the tech dudes answer, and the booth is brought back down onto the stage.  The door of the booth opens and Britney steps out and says she's not finished yet.  She says she went back to prehistoric times to see if it's true.  "If what's true?" Bill asks.  Lindsey steps out of the booth and answers, "If she's so easy a caveman would do her."  A caveman, like from the Geico commercials, steps out wearing a suit and carrying a club.  "Oh it's true," he says, "She's easier than a Slezak."  He clubs Paris in the face and carries her off.

Bill and Ted tell Britney to give it up, that it's over.  She says she's going to use the booth to fix her life and forget everything that's ever happened. "The booth is ours!" Bill and Ted cry.  "The booth is mine!" Britney argues.  "No, the booth is ours!" Bill and Ted insist.  Britney becomes furious and screams in an otherworldly voice, "The booth is mine!"  Lindsey cries that she's scared.  The Transformers theme plays and Bill says he knows that sound and that it's from the 80's.  The Transformer "Boothbot" (which is shaped like a phone booth, and is in fact their phone booth) drops down on wires.  Bill & Ted are amazed that their booth is a Transformer.  "Yes, and I have feelings!" Boothbot says, "I'm sick of being used.  Do you realize how many people have been inside me just tonight?"  "I know how you feel," Paris says.  Boothbot says he is there to help Britney Spears transform her life.  Britney says she's going to beat the crap out of him and rip off his nuts and his bolts.  As she's about to attack him, the phone rings, which is located in the robot's crotch.  The robot asks if anyone will get it.  Boothbot finally answers it himself and says, "Mom, I told you not to call me on my private line!"

Boothbot then says, "What?  You've got Justin Timberlake?  Well, sure, bring him on down!  We could use some dancing!"  The phone booth lands and Justin Timberlake exits, starting the big musical montage finale with Britney, Avril, Fergie, the Beastie Boys and Gerard Way.  During the very last number, The Black Parade by My Chemical Romance, the stage floor spins.  Bill & Ted urge the audience to "Be Excellent to One Another" and to "Party On, Dudes!"  They pants Rocky and then tell the audience they love them and hope to see them next year.

Actors

• Bill S. Preston, Esquire
• Ted "Theodore" Logan
• Jack Bauer
• Christina Aguilera
• Brittany Spears
• Paris Hilton
• Lindsay Lohan
• Dr. Doom
• Simon Petrelli
• Claire Bennet
• Rocky Balboa
• Leonidas
• Jack Sparrow
• Will Turner
• Michael Myers
• News Reporter
• Spiderman (Symbiote Suit)
• Ex-Terminator
• Cherry Darling
• Rosie 'O Donnell
• Donald Trump
• Geico Caveman
• Boothbot Transformer
• Justin Timberlake
• Avril Lavigne
• Fergie
• Beastie Boys
• Gerald Way

Videos

Universal Studios Hollywood Bill and Ted's Excellent Halloween Adventure

HHN Bill & Ted Show

Soundtrack

Christina Aguilera - Candyman (Audio)

Two Heads Are Better Than One

Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go

Spider-Man Theme (Junkie XL Remix)

The Apprentice Theme

All Out of Love

The Transformers (Theme)

Welcome to the Black Parade